SCORE ONE FOR THE LAWYER

If you've read this one before, forgive me. I just love it so much, and in honor of Columbus Day, I had to dust it off again. For a history lover, this is nerd-humor heaven! I'm told this is a true story. If it is, I need to find this attorney because he is now my idol. If it's not, three cheers for the creative genius who came up with this!

*******
A New Orleans lawyer sought an FHA loan for a client. He was told the loan would be granted if he could prove satisfactory title to a parcel of property being offered as collateral. The title to the property dated back to 1803, which took the lawyer three months to track down. After sending the information to the FHA, he received the following reply.

(Actual reply from FHA):
"Upon review of your letter adjoining your client's loan application, we note that the request is supported by an Abstract of Title. While we compliment the able manner in which you have prepared and presented the application, we must point out that you have only cleared title to the proposed collateral property back to1803. Before final approval can be accorded, it will be necessary to clear the title back to its origin."

Annoyed, the lawyer responded as follows:
(Actual response):
"Your letter regarding title in Case No.189156 has been received. I note that you wish to have title extended further than the 206 years covered by the present application. I was unaware that any educated person in this country, particularly those working in the property area, would not know that Louisiana was purchased by the United States from France in 1803, the year of origin identified in our application.

For the edification of uninformed FHA bureaucrats, the title to the land prior to U.S. ownership was obtained from France , which had acquired it by Right of Conquest from Spain. The land came into the possession of Spain by Right of Discovery made in the year 1492 by a sea captain named Christopher Columbus, who had been granted the privilege of seeking a new route to India by the Spanish monarch, Queen Isabella. The good Queen Isabella, being a pious woman and almost as careful about titles as the FHA, took the precaution of securing the blessing of the Pope before she sold her jewels to finance Columbus 's expedition.

Now the Pope, as I'm sure you may know, is the emissary of Jesus Christ, the Son of God, and God, it is commonly accepted, created this world. Therefore, I believe it is safe to presume that God also made that part of the world called Louisiana. God, therefore, would be the owner of origin and His origins date back to before the beginning of time, the world as we know it, and the FHA. I hope you find God's original claim to be satisfactory.

Now, may we have our loan?"

The loan was immediately approved.

FOOD: HISTORICALLY SPEAKING

I love food, which may explain my fascination for one of my favorite research books--"Plantation Life at Rose Hill: The Diaries of Martha Ogle Foreman, 1814-1845." Catchy, eh? But really, it is a great book in that Martha Foreman wrote an entry almost every day of her married life giving us a fascinating glimpse into what she and her contemporaries ate, how they prepared it, how they preserved it, and the quantities of food they put up each year. Amazing! Eating required hard work, and lots of it. Really stop and think about the effort required to have a jar of jam on hand, or the bread to slather it upon. Think about a nice breakfast and imagine the time and prep involved in preparing such favorite menu items as sausage, bacon, biscuits, ham, pastries. No wonder eggs, bread and oatmeal often topped the list. I was really fascinated by the quantities of food a plantation had to produce to feed everyone. Rose Hill was run using slave labor, albeit well-treated slave-labor, if such a thing can be said. When they slaughtered hogs they were talking thirty-nine in a day from which she reports rendering 78 hams, 24 pieces of middling (salt pork), 12 jowls and 10 chins, along with what we must assume was bacon, and a host of by-products. A few days later she discusses making the sausage. Every day was a critical food prep day. Canning was still relatively new for households, so everything was salted, pickled, dried or smoked. An entry that discusses oysters talks about pickling them in large batches of twenty pounds or more. Imagine then rendering the lard, churning butter, and storing the fruit and root vegetables in the root cellar. Or digging up the yams and potatoes with a shovel, or catching, killing, plucking and preparing a chicken for supper. I think I would have been eating a lot of bread. I could go on and on, but suffice it to say we have it easy today. So when you open a can, defrost a pizza, or toss some dried noodles into a pot of boiling water heated over a stove you didn't have to chop wood for, give thanks! Martha Ogle lived along a tributary that feeds into the Chesapeake Bay, so seafood of all varities, including the famous Maryland Blue Crab, was part of her diet. Here's a crab cake recipe from one of my favorite food sites, Kitchen Daily. It uses a local seasoning that's practically its own food group here in Maryland--Old Bay Seasoning. Enjoy! BAKED CRAB CAKES with LEMON MUSTARD SAUCE FOR CRAB CAKES: 1/3 cup mayonnaise (preferably flavored with olive oil) 2 tablespoons Dijon mustard Zest of 1 lemon 1 teaspoon Old Bay seasoning 1 tablespoon chopped fresh parsley leaves 2 scallions, finely chopped 1 large egg 1 pound lump crabmeat Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper to taste 1 cup bread crumbs FOR LEMON MUSTARD SAUCE: 1/2 cup mayonnaise Juice of 1 lemon 2 tablespoons Dijon mustard 1 tablespoon chopped fresh parsley Directions: Gather the following tools: cutting board, chef's knife, dry measuring cups, measuring spoons, small and large mixing bowls, rubber spatula, spoons, sheet pan, offset spatula Preheat the oven to 400F. In a large bowl, mix together mayonnaise, Dijon mustard, lemon zest, Old Bay, parsley, scallions, and egg. Add crab meat, season with salt and pepper, and stir well. Form crab cakes into a ball using about 1/4 cup of crab mixture for each cake. Dip the cakes into the breadcrumbs, flatten to about 1 inch high, and place on a lightly oiled sheet pan. Bake for 10 minutes. While the crab cakes are baking, prepare the sauce by combining all the ingredients in a small bowl. Serve the crab cakes with Lemon Mustard Sauce. Read more: http://www.kitchendaily.com/recipe/baked-crab-cakes-with-lemon-mustard-sauce-149400/#ixzz1IAzLGuM3

SNAPSHOTS OF HISTORY

While conducting research for my books I come across some really wonderful finds. The best are almost always the actual accounts people have left behind--their journal entries, or snippets from personal correspondence--underscoring the critical nature of keeping paper records, which is fast becoming a lost art in our electronic world.

There is a wonderful site called "Eyewitness to History" that is a priceless collection of true accounts of great historical moments and events. Every adult will enjoy these true-life glimpses and every student will need at least a few of these as they prepare papers on ancient kingdoms or US history.

The site and it's accounts will enlighten us on some topics, showing the incredible elegance and ingenuity of people who managed great feats without all our modern technology. It also blasts holes in romantic myths of courtly behavior during Medieval times, displaying the atrocities that occurred in those stunning castles, illustrating the barbarism nobles inflicted on the peasantry to construct them, and then to support the lifestyle.

I've spoken several times on the need to maintain a personal record. No one's life, no matter how mundane we may think it is, will be without value to someone looking back upon it. One of my very favorite references is a published diary of Martha Ogle Foreman, the young wife of a wealthy plantation owner and military man. Her diary entries are short and concise accounts of her daily work with occasional entries about the weather, the people who visited her, and the trips she took. It is an invaluable look at plantation life in the early nineteenth century, and it debunks the "The Gone With The Wind" idea about lazy lives of pleasure. Everyone worked--hard.

One of my favorite examples of the need to keep records comes from Dolley Madison's letters during the final hours at the President's House before it was burned by the British. These were a great resource to me during the writing of "Dawn's Early Light." A friend of the family who became disaffected from James Madison wrote a scathing report about the president saying he abandoned Dolley in the dangerous hours prior to the British entry into Washington, in a cowardly effort to save his own skin.

Dolley's letters to her sister, and a copy of hurriedly scribbled notes from James to her shows a very different picture. James told her over and over to be prepared to leave the house at any moment, and then he sent wave after wave of men to ferry her away, but he own letters prove that she chose not to leave without him. That she actually had those who had been sent to save her ruffled to the point of near anger with her, but still, she would not budge until she had secured a few of the nation's treasure, including the famed portrait of George Washington, and was assured she was completely out of time. Had it not been for her own record, history would have had only the bitter and untrue account of a disaffected friend which would have forever tarnished James Madison's reputation.

So why should any of this matter to us? Someone will write our record. Will we trust how we are remembered to someone else, or will we set the record straight? It's in our hands.

WHAT DO WE REALLY WANT IN A LEADER?

I spent much of Presidents' Day at the ER with my husband. Gratefully, he's fine, but I missed the chance for my annual rant about the dissing of poor George Washington. Again I say. the more you know, the more you understand, but Americans have short memories, or maybe I should say that Americans in many cases have little knowledge, and that is both disheartening and worrisome. The old saying about those who forget the past are destined to repeat it? Apply that logic to the people we place on pedestals and then set in the White House.

On February 18, Gallup released the latest presidential poll. President Reagan was the winner, in fact, this question has been asked eight times in the last twelve years and the winner has consistently been Lincoln, Clinton or Reagan. George Washington, the father of our country, the leader of the Continental Army, victor of the Revolutionary War, the glue that held the Constitutional Convention together, beloved first President of the nation, the man who could have been a king but who resigned the presidency to secure this nation's liberty--this man comes in at number five, behind Clinton and Kennedy. What of Jefferson, the author of the Declaration of Independence, or Madison who framed the Constitution. Are we still grateful for these men? Do we even remember? Hmmm. . . .

I loved Ronald Reagan, and who can deny Abraham Lincoln's courage and vision, but couldn't the same be said of Washington? It all begs the question, "What do we actually know of our nation's presidential history?" Perhaps it raises an even more critical question. "What do we really want in a leader?"

While pollsters and pundits analyze every move or non-move by Barack Obama, we need only look at this poll to see that the American people are slightly schizophrenic when choosing a president. Obama was called "a rock star" by some voters who, if the polls are correct, now wish he was more decisive like Reagan. Others upset by his recent withdrawal of support by the "Defense of Marriage Act" seem to want a more morally conservative president, but then how does that jive with the number two ranking of Clinton, and Kennedy's number six slot, behind Washington? My head is spinning.

I'm over fifty. My peers and I grew up with the images of the presidents in every classroom. We were taught the biographies of the Founding Fathers, and we were quizzed on the major accomplishments of the early presidents. As a guest speaker, I've visited classrooms and I rarely see those comforting, familiar images anymore. They were once the supermen of history, but time and political correctness have been their Kryptonite.

I wish parents and teachers would bring the pictures back out, dust them off and teach this generation about these visionaries. Tell the whole story--the good, the bad, the amazing stories of valor. Greatness can stand the scrutiny. The race is already beginning for 2012. What do we really want in a leader?

SCORE ONE FOR THE LAWYER!!!

For a history lover, this is nerd heaven as far as humor goes! I'm told this is a true story. If it is, I need to find this attorney because he is now my idol. If it's not, three cheers for the creative genius who came up with this! Thanks to Kay Curtis for sharing it with me!

*******
A New Orleans lawyer sought an FHA loan for a client. He was told the loan would be granted if he could prove satisfactory title to a parcel of property being offered as collateral. The title to the property dated back to 1803, which took the lawyer three months to track down. After sending the information to the FHA, he received the following reply.

(Actual reply from FHA):
"Upon review of your letter adjoining your client's loan application, we note that the request is supported by an Abstract of Title. While we compliment the able manner in which you have prepared and presented the application, we must point out that you have only cleared title to the proposed collateral property back to1803. Before final approval can be accorded, it will be necessary to clear the title back to its origin."

Annoyed, the lawyer responded as follows:
(Actual response):
"Your letter regarding title in Case No.189156 has been received. I note that you wish to have title extended further than the 206 years covered by the present application. I was unaware that any educated person in this country, particularly those working in the property area, would not know that Louisiana was purchased by the United States from France in 1803, the year of origin identified in our application.

For the edification of uninformed FHA bureaucrats, the title to the land prior to U.S. ownership was obtained from France , which had acquired it by Right of Conquest from Spain. The land came into the possession of Spain by Right of Discovery made in the year 1492 by a sea captain named Christopher Columbus, who had been granted the privilege of seeking a new route to India by the Spanish monarch, Queen Isabella. The good Queen Isabella, being a pious woman and almost as careful about titles as the FHA, took the precaution of securing the blessing of the Pope before she sold her jewels to finance Columbus 's expedition.

Now the Pope, as I'm sure you may know, is the emissary of Jesus Christ, the Son of God, and God, it is commonly accepted, created this world. Therefore, I believe it is safe to presume that God also made that part of the world called Louisiana. God, therefore, would be the owner of origin and His origins date back to before the beginning of time, the world as we know it, and the FHA. I hope you find God's original claim to be satisfactory.

Now, may we have our @&#% loan?"

The loan was immediately approved.