Thursday, January 22, 2009


I was searching through my files the other day and I came across a page of notes I had typed up several years ago after watching a seminar on improving relationships. Noted LDS speaker John Lund, (no relation to Gerald), specializes in the field of Communications and Interpersonal Relationships. His books and tapes on these subjects are favorites and he is a frequent presenter at Education Week.

Whenever one of Brother Lund’s children marries he starts their new union off right by giving them the seven steps presented below. I was so impressed by his simple but profound exercises, cleverly titled "The Magnificent Seven", that I passed the advice along to each of my children through our family newsletter.

Knowing that financial stresses often take their toll on marriages, I thought now might be a good time to dust these tips off and recommit myself, and perhaps inspire others to recommit to working harder at showing love in our marriages. Try doing each step every day for a solid week with your spouse or intended. Evaluate and then continue to commit to doing the ones that work best for you.

The Magnificent Seven

1. 1 verbal “I Love You” with eye contact.
2. A 5 second kiss
3. 10 second expression of appreciation ( can be a phone call)
4. 15 minute “Honey-do” (can be “banked within 1 week only for a 1 ¾ hour “honey-do”.)
5. 2o second hug
6. 25 second written expression of appreciation
7. 30 Minute Talk Time (This is real, focused, concentrated Talk Time which can be broken up, i.e. 5 minutes when you first get home, 10 minutes at dinner, 15 minutes at bedtime).

Good luck!

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